K - K - Kome On: The Ice Cream Family Corner & Sandwiches Mascot Offends the Perpetually Offended Denizens of Organized Blackness

Quite note: technical difficulties have postponed the first SBPDL Podcast until tomorrow night. 

How often do you read about a companies marketing campaign being declared 'racist'? The slightest racial insensitivity in advertising is deemed the second-coming of the KKK, an obvious (and ominous) sign that America is prepared for cross-burnings, a shortage of white sheets at Wal-Mart, Target, Macy's, Nordstrom's, Linens 'n Things, Bed Bath and Beyond, and Costco, and discriminatory violence courtesy of nooses and robed individuals.

Not unlike the type of violence directed at whites nationwide by Black people in the summer of 2011.

In the real world, the KKK has - a rough estimate - less than 1,500 members. Of those, 1,300 are paid informants of the FBI or other organizations that monitor "hate," and the dwindling few reactionaries are clamoring to go on the now defunct Jerry Springer Show for some precious airtime.

This fact doesn't dissuade Black people and Disingenuous White Liberals (DWLs) from believing that this "invisible empire" is poised for a comeback and prepared to strike at a moments whim. In the book I Heard it Through the Grapevine: Rumor in African-American Culture, we learn that the most pernicious myth plaguing Black people is the continued belief that the KKK went underground and infiltrated companies nationwide, trading white sheets for balanced sheets:

One of the most persistent themes in the world of black rumors is the fearsome powers of the Ku Klux Klan. For example, during the 1980s and even up to the present, many blacks firmly believed that the Church’s Fried Chicken fast food chain was owned by the Klan and that its food was doctored to sterilize black men. In 1984, a congressman actually had the FDA conduct mass spectrometry and gas chromatography tests on Church’s chicken to see what was in it. Naturally, the FDA found nothing suspicious, but these results did not satisfy “the folk,” as Prof. Turner often calls blacks. Some of her informants explained that the Klan would have had no trouble persuading the FDA to lie about the tests.

Another recent Klan enterprise is said to have been the Troop Sport clothing company, which was founded in 1985 and sold 95 percent of its clothes to blacks and Hispanics. The Troop name reportedly stood for “To Rule Over Oppressed People,” and the linings of shoes and jackets were supposed to contain messages like “Thank you, nigger, for making us rich.” Some young blacks who wore Troop clothes despite the rumor and subsequent boycott were attacked as traitors by other blacks.

Troop spent hundreds of thousands of dollars trying to fight the rumor. It hired the black singing group Gladys Night and the Pips to improve its image and posted anti-Klan posters in stores. The campaign failed and Troop went bankrupt, though the company denied that the boycott was the cause.

Prof. Turner tells us that the most recent alleged Klan front has been the Brooklyn Bottling Company, which sells a soda called Tropical Fantasy. Like Church’s chicken, the soda was said to be laced with a drug that would selectively sterilize black men. There is no odorless, tasteless substance that sterilizes anyone, much less only black men, but the FDA duly trotted out its mass spectrometers and cleared Tropical Fantasy. The rumor was unaffected and caused serious losses for Brooklyn Bottling. It also provoked violence; blacks attacked delivery trucks and roughed up storekeepers who stocked Tropical Fantasy.

“The folk” credit the Klan with many achievements. It is said to have killed John Kennedy and to be deeply involved in the tobacco business. The eponymous founders of Philip Morris and R.J. Reynolds are both said to have been important Klan members (despite the fact that Philip Morris was British), and Kool menthol cigarettes are suspect because of the brand’s ominous misspelling.

The Klan is likewise thought to have killed Martin Luther King, though the government may have helped. As one informant said, “I heard it was the FBI or the KKK—one of those groups.” Prof. Turner notes that for many of “the folk,” there is no real difference between the two.

Enter an ice cream parlor started by immigrants in Ocala, Florida, the latest incarnation of the KKK's impending return:

Once and for all, people, it's an ice cream cone.

The owners of Ice Cream Family Corner and Sandwiches at the busy intersection of South Pine Avenue and Southwest 17th Street in Ocala say their two-month-old business is getting creamed because passers-by have mistaken their white-hooded ice cream cone mascot for a KKK protester.

Liza Diaz, who manages the store for Cantres and co-owner Jesus Diaz, said an employee at the bank where she does business told her a co-worker was so frightened by the white dollop patrolling the street corner that she called her husband cryingand refused to drive through the intersection.

"One (customer) told me, ‘I had to think twice before coming in here because I thought it was KKK,' " Diaz said.

Bigotry never tasted so good.

Interestingly, Diaz, who is from Puerto Rico, had never heard of the KKK before this controversy. She can't even quite get her tongue around the name, referring to the white supremacist group as the "Ku Ku Klan" without a hint of irony or sarcasm.

Close up, the costume looks nothing like the white-hooded Klan garb that evokes such strong emotions. Its fluffy white top, flecked with colored sprinkles, curls slightly at its peak, and it sits atop a brown waffle cone.

Co-owner Jose Cantres says rumors are swirling on Facebook about the exact nature of the little vanilla cone, and employees heard through word of mouth that potential customers have steered clear of the shop to avoid the character.

Here's another story from the local Fox-affiliate, complete with hilarious Local News Story broadcast. If America survives when whites are the minority (judging by Detroit and the many cities and counties abandoned to the Black Undertow and the rate white people flee states that go Brown, this won't be the case), will recent immigrants - turned entrepreneur, because of the relative few Black people opening businesses - be embarrassed for opening up a store and creating a harmless mascot that barely has a resemblance to a KKK member?

Yes. Of course. Then again, if there is ever a run on white bed sheets, you better believe the Mainstream Media will have story prepared on this dramatic development.

What is your favorite story of Organized Blackness complaining about a business or corporation using unflattering advertisements to market their product or service that self-righteous DWLs and "The Blacks" decided to boycott and attack as 'racist'?

Alright, for some reason this story made me desire vanilla ice cream. Might even put some chocolate sprinkles on it.

Ice Cream store mascot mistaken for KKK: MyFoxORLANDO.com