Well, they thought they'd have some fun over at Career Builder (CareerBuilder.com) in creating an article with the potential to go viral. But they failed to include the most pertinent metric in understanding if your city could survive a zombie apocalypse: demographics. [Could your city survive a zombie apocalypse?, CareerBuilder.com, 10-29-15]:
With more and more movies and TV shows debuting every year about reanimated corpses rising from the grave to attack the living, zombies are a horror staple that – pardon the pun – just won't stay dead.
In light of that, and in the spirit of Halloween, CareerBuilder and EMSI decided to take a look at which major U.S. cities have the best odds of surviving the zombie apocalypse. By weighing the pros and cons of each city's economic make up, the Zombie Apocalypse Index offers a glimpse at which cities have the best chances to save the human race, and which ones would be conquered by the undead.
Click to view the full Zombie Apocalypse Index interactive map.
The brains behind the index
Each metro's survival score is reached by weighing 8 factors in 4 different categories – Defense, Containment, Cure and Food. An overall score of 100 represents the highest possible likelihood of riding out the hordes of walking dead, while lower scores indicate greater chances of becoming zombie fodder.
Occupational and industry data was sourced from EMSI and Census Bureau Data.
Military Occupations (% Population) 15% Defense Protective Services (% Population) 15% Defense Small Arms/Ammo Manufacturing (% Total Exports) 15% Defense Engineers (% Population) 15% Containment Construction Trade Occupations (% Population) 15% Containment Population Weighted Density -15% Containment Biotechnology and Medical Research Occupations (% Population) 20% Cure Food Manufacturing (% Total Exports) 20% Food Supply
Standard, flesh eating virus, transmitted via biting or contact with infected blood assumed. This is scientific and completely accurate, obviously.
MOST LIKELY TO SURVIVE
Representing America's best hope for finding a zombie cure, and boasting considerable scores in both Defense and Containment, Boston tops the list of the cities most likely to survive the zombie apocalypse, with a total score of 43.99 out of 100 possible points.
- Boston-Cambridge-Newton, MA-NH (43.99 points)
- Salt Lake City, UT (39.49 points)
- Columbus, OH (39.31 points)
- Baltimore-Columbia-Towson, MD (39.29 points)
- Virginia Beach-Norfolk-Newport New, VA-NC (38.55 points)
- Seattle-Tacoma-Bellevue, WA (37.49 points)
- San Diego-Carlsbad, CA (36.96 points)
- Kansas City, MO-KS (35.03 points)
- Denver-Aurora-Lakewood, CO (34.66 points)
- Indianapolis-Carmel-Anderson, IN (33.91 points)
LEAST LIKELY TO SURVIVE
While New York has survived any number of horror, sci-fi and natural disasters in movies and TV shows, it's actually not the best place to be during a zombie apocalypse. New York's high population density and limited food supply contribute to its place as the least likely of all major U.S. metros to survive an invasion of reanimated, brain-hungry corpses.
Considering how many American cities haven't survived the loss of its founding, white population (replaced with a black or non-white majority), zombies seem hardly to be a problem worth worrying about.
- New York-Newark-Jersey City, NY-NJ-PA (5.64 points)
- Tampa-St. Petersberg-Clearwater, FL (11.03 points)
- Los Angeles-LongBeach-Anaheim, CA (12.98 points)
- Riverside-San Bernadino-Ontario, CA (13.34 points)
- Chicago-Naperville-Elgin, IL-IN-WI (16.38 points)
- Miami-Fort Lauderdale-West Palm Beach, FL (16.78 points)
- Jacksonville, FL (17.21 points)
- Milwaukee-Waukesha-West Allis, WI (18.31 points)
- Providence-Warwick, RI-MA (19.24 points)
- Las Vegas-Henderson-Paradise, NV (19.41 points)
The great indicator for if your city will be able to survive its demographic situation is measured in this breakdown of American cities/counties usage of EBT/SNAP (food stamp) by race, detailing in horrific splendor the reality of the Free Shit Army (FSA) prepared to level civilization if their EBT Card ever stopped working.
It's a plague far, far worse than zombies, because you pay for this army to proliferate and survive.
And, courtesy of Wikipedia, these are the cities you would be best to avoid if the outbreak of the zombie apocalypse or, the more likely scenarios, the coming of the FSA unleashed by the EBT Card no longer working:
Rank | City | Percentage Black or African American | Total Black or African American |
---|---|---|---|
1 | Detroit, MI | 82.7 | 590,226 |
2 | Jackson, MS | 79.4 | 137,716 |
3 | Chester, PA | 77.8 | 26,429 |
4 | Miami Gardens, FL | 76.3 | 81,776 |
5 | Orangeburg, SC | 75.04 | 13,964 |
6 | Birmingham, AL | 73.4 | 155,791 |
7 | Wilkinsburg, PA | 69.8 | 11,118 |
8 | Baltimore, MD | 63.7 | 395,781 |
9 | Memphis, TN | 63.3 | 409,687 |
10 | New Orleans, LA | 60.2 | 206,871 |
11 | Baton Rouge, LA | 58.5 | 126,250 |
12 | Wilmington, DE | 58 | 41,326 |
13 | Flint, MI | 56.6 | 57,939 |
14 | Savannah, GA | 55.4 | 75,507 |
15 | Augusta, GA | 54.7 | 107,182 |
16 | Shreveport, LA | 54.7 | 109,022 |
17 | Montgomery, AL | 54.5 | 116,524 |
18 | Atlanta, GA | 54.0 | 226,894 |
19 | Cleveland, OH | 53.3 | 211,672 |
20 | Portsmouth, VA | 53.3 | 50,878 |
Remember, we've already seen what happens when civilization breaks down and the FSA - a horror far more macabre than a zombie apocalypse - is unleashed: 2005 New Orleans after Hurricane Katrina swept away the veneer of civilization and reality of race was exposed.