Being quiet during movies is a struggle for Black people. The desire to communicate with the actors in the film leave Black people propels them to engage in a constant stream of dialogue hoping to change the outcome of the movie.
This is the exclusive reason Black people are loud at the movies: they believe that being vociferous during the film can help the protagonist escape from a harrowing situation.
It is unknown if Black people refrain from talking during Tyler Perry films, because no white person has ever viewed a Tyler Perry film at the theater (akin to the philosophical question “if a tree falls in the forest and no one is around, does it make a sound?).
However, any individual who takes umbrage with a Black person for sustained outbursts during films is encouraged to read the following tale of woe from California:
LANCASTER -- A man is recovering from being stabbed in the neck with a meat thermometer after asking a woman to silence her cell phone in a movie theater, a sheriff's department official said.
The stabbing occurred Saturday at the Cinemark 22 theater at 2600 West Avenue I in Lancaster, according to Detective Richard Cartmill of the Lancaster sheriff's station.
The theater was packed for a 9 p.m. Saturday screening of the Martin Scorsese horror movie 'Shutter Island' when the victim complained about a woman near him who was using a cell phone during the show.
She and two men with her left the movie theater.Two men returned a few minutes later and stabbed the victim, said sheriff's spokesman Steve Whitmore.
The victim was hospitalized but is expected to survive.Two other people who attempted to help the victim were also injured in the altercation.
Sheriff's officials describe the suspects as black males.
One man was wearing an orange hat with an orange jacket or jersey.The other man was dressed in a black hooded sweatshirt.”
“Being shushed” during the viewing of a film is a flagrant violation of the code Black people operate under when they venture into the movie theater, for talking during a movie is a time-honored tradition in the Black community.
In Black Run America (BRA), the price of such an impetuous request such as pleading for silence during a movie is met with a defiant look of “did I just get shushed by whitey?” and in some cases, large apertures in your flesh courtesy of a meat thermometer.
Black people are loud. A trip to any high school or college graduation will supply ample evidence for this assessment, as parents are normally instructed to hold all clapping until all graduates names have been called and they have received their diplomas.
However, Black families disregard this plea for celebratory restraint and cheer wildly for their progeny (or any other Black graduate) once their name is called and they walk across the stage soaked in congratulatory praise.
Shushing by the tranquil, subdued white crowd will only result in an increased output of noise from the astonished Black patrons, who aren’t cognizant of rules governing acceptable behavior at graduations, let alone the messages that play before each feature film that admonishes theater-goers to silence cell phones, pagers and refrain from talking during the movie.
In BRA, shushing of Black people is a risky endeavor that is strongly discouraged by any annoyed individual perturbed by the lack of self-control exercised by said Black person.
Shushing can be categorized as asking a Black person to turn down their music on public transportation (ear phones are required, but scarcely utilized by Black people on public transportation); asking a Black person to turn off their cell phone in the theater and discontinue their intense conversation perpetually distracting you from the movie; asking Black people to respect the wishes of the administration and wait until all graduates names have been called until clapping or cheering; or, if you are a Crusading White Pedagogue, asking for your students to pay attention to your lecture, instead of engaging in distracting chatter that inflicts ruination on the few pupils who desire an education.
Stuff Black People Don’t Like includes being shushed, for life under the auspices of BRA guarantees Black people the right to be loud, regardless of the situation or venue. Shushing of Black people, even in a library, is a risky decision and could endanger your life.