Wednesday, September 29, 2010

No Homo: The Fall of Bishop Long

Mark your calendars: 10-10-10 approaches. The first year of Stuff Black People Don't Like released in book form.

A major announcement will accompany the release of the book as well. Major. What will that be, you inquire? Stay tuned. Just know that Stuff Black People Don't Like draws the proverbial line on 10-10-10. Prepare yourselves.

Bishop Long with George W. Bush
Speaking of preparing oneself, news of a most shocking nature is shaking the very foundations of a mega-church in Atlanta. Alleged sexual abuse by Bishop Eddie Long, a man who has denounced homosexuality and led marches against gay marriage, is causing his congregation much consternation and contemplation.

No Homo, right? Of course all of the sexual predatory accusations are alleged at this point and Bishop Eddie Long - a man who preaches the gospel of Jesus-Christ with noticeable nod to the charismatic Ric Flair of professional wrestling fame - is presumed innocent at this point.

Nonetheless, the accusations of homosexual, predatory misconduct are piling up against a man who loves form-fitting suits and takes Facebook quality photos of himself with a cellphone wearing Under Armor:

"This man manipulated us from childhood," Parris told WAGA-TV, who interviewed the 23-year-old outside a Colorado grocery store. "This was our father and we loved him."
Parris, who alleged that Long used church funds to lavish him and the other victims with gifts, said he reached out to the bishop privately before filing suit.
"This man turned his back on us when he had no more need for us," Parris told WAGA-TV. "That's not a man. That's a predator."
Attorney B.J. Bernstein, who represents the accusers, said she did not authorize the interview.
In a civil lawsuit filed last Wednesday, Parris, a former member of New Birth Missionary Baptist Church and one of Long's "spiritual sons," claims the charismatic bishop made him call him “Daddy," exploiting his role as a father figure and mentor.
Long has denied the allegations and told his congregation Sunday he will "vigorously" fight the charges against him. He has yet to comment on Parris' interview.
Meanwhile, 32 pastors gathered at the New Birth Missionary Baptist Church on Tuesday evening.
No Homo, right?

Bishop Eddie Long preaches in DeKalb County, renowned as one of the top counties for Black people in America. This lawsuit filed for alleged sexual misconduct with four (thus far) Black male accusers threatens to hit Long where it hurts the most; the pocket book.

You see, Bishop Long is cut from the same cloth of entertainers who have graced the squared circle of professional wrestling. He created a character, a persona, that played well to an audience (25,000 members of the New Birth Missionary Baptist Church and countless celebrity Black friends), all the while acting and manipulating them for financial gain.

He became a limosine riding, jet flying, kiss stealing, Rolex wearing, wheeling-dealing son of a gun that Ric Flair has boasted about in promos for years. Bishop Long was the same type of actor, manipulating the passions of the crowd (congregation) for his own economic betterment.

In a way, white professional wrestling grapplers have long influenced Black athletes, singers and entertainers. Bishop Long is first and foremost an entertainer, exciting his flock with verbosity and linguistically charged sermons that resonate with the power of God, but he owes a debt of gratitude to Gorgeous George:
Some fans--and NFL suits--are appalled. They long for the days before the hip-hop-ization of American sports, when you broke the plane and didn't get fancy. Even those who enjoy the end zone antics tend to see them as, Billy White Shoes Johnson's Funky Chicken aside, a new thing and a black thing. But not so: This all goes back some 60 years to one slightly pudgy white man, a wrestler, who's since been largely forgotten. It's a Gorgeous thing.

Wrestlers have long influenced hip hop and been a catalyst for Black people to hone their persona's, creating larger-than-life images of themselves to broadcast out to the world. Funny, that's all they are, though, images of what they want people to believe.

In reality, they play a character for the amusement of others. It appears Bishop Long bought into this idea and has played the character perfectly, all the while amassing popularity, a vast fortune and prestige.Where some wrestlers have catch-phrases to get the crowd fired-up (and to purchase merchandise), Bishop Long implores people to "Cross it up" with much gusto and fanfare.

One can only speculate if he told the alleged accusers to "Cross it up"... No Homo, right?

We wish Bishop Long 'God speed' in his upcoming legal battles against the accusers. DeKalb County hasn't had much positive news of late and the harrowing news that a beloved Bishop is someone who might have not stated "No Homo" is just to much to swallow.

Professional wrestling is fake, the wrestlers merely acting. Sadly, it appears Bishop Long bought into this character and the "Big Man" persona he had created.


Anonymous said...

The Gorgeous George thing is fascinating- black people didn't even invent trash talking.

Anonymous said...

Thanks for showing this, SBPDL. Going to black church is like going to a very entertaining concert each week. Lights, video, music, microphones, flashy clothing and sequins. Like a concert, you do have to pay an entry fee (10%), and if you pay more and put your name on the tithe envelope, you get your name mentioned, you get a VIP pass to heaven, AND you get to sit in the front row on Sunday. Black preachers are only well-dressed pimps. Christian blacks need strong black religious leadership or else they are lost and bewildered. Black preachers are so easily able to whip their black congregations up into a frenzy of talking in tongues, booty poppin', and gettin' the holy spirit. It is very entertaining to watch, exactly like on the last video.

Don't tread on me... said...

How ironic that while an overwhelming number of blacks are christian and display a "profound spirituality", they haven't realized that they have forever and truly enslaved themselves by taking on their enslavers religion. By turning their backs on their african gods/root religions, they have placed their necks firmly in the spiritual yoke of their masters for eternity. Re: the homosexual facet of this story: I have seen many young blacks cruising for men at the Y I belong to while maintaining a tough guy image upon leaving. Complete with sports themed attire and requisite scowl. There's way more down-low activity by black men than most people realize. It's one of those unspoken truths that they would like to bury. You know, like the black womens coveting another races hair neurosis. I don't even think a lot of them are gay, just unable to control their desire for sex, with anyone, anywhere, anytime. Zero self control. I think the std rate by race will bear this out.

Anonymous said...

You should change the name to" stuff blacks dont like". I find them to be revolting, criminal, deranged. Not people..just blacks.

Anonymous said...

"they have forever and truly enslaved themselves by taking on their enslavers religion."

LOL Blacks have embraced Christianity???


Blacks have the highest violent crime rate, highest murder rate, highest rape rate, highest dropout rate, highest illegitimacy rate, highest illiteracy rate, etc etc etc.

Blaming whitey or blaming Christianity for atrocious, immoral, self-destructive, anti-social, and criminal black behavior is absurd, but not surprising.

Same old negro song and dance.

Blue Eyed Devil said...

This is one of the reasons I hate organized religion in this country. The landscape is dotted with crusading leaders that are fakes and frauds and it seems that black folks have a version in Eddie Long. Time will tell.

Stuff Black People Don't Like said...

I've made it a point to not bring up religion at this blog in any form, but I couldn't help but finally bring out the reference to Gorgeous George and his creation off of Black culture.

Eddie Long is channeling Ric Flair in virtually every video I've seen him in.

Blue Eyed Devil said...

The only thing missing from the "Cross it up" video is Eddie Long shuffling around the podium with a gold championship belt around his waist and Gordon Solie with a microphone off to the side waiting to conduct an interview. It would capture the old NWA to a T. Wooooooooo!!!!!!

Anonymous said...

Blacks embrace Christianity? Many blacks follow Black Liberation Theology which is supposed to be 'Christian'.

That is kind of like saying many Mexicans are Catholic. Yet they worship Saint Death, Santa Muerte,

Anonymous said...

It's pretty funny to see the difference in the style of worship seen in the black churches and everyone else. Catholics, Muslims, Jews, etc., have a much more intellectualized, structured, and orderly method of worship. Blacks just jump up and down, chant out biblical fragments and imagery and surrender all cognitive ability to blind emotion. I had the fortunate experience of attending a black ministry and listening to the explanation of the Holy Trinity. It was the worst explanation I'd ever heard but that didn't matter, there were lots of "mmm hmmm" and "that's right" in response. That's when it hit me, the patrons are not responding to the content of the message, but rather the method of delivery. In other words, the pastor could have just been saying "blah blah ... blah blah blah" but belting it out emotionally like an Otis Redding song, and the crowd would have been crossing it up like those in the video.

Porter said...


Off topic I realize: I recently returned from a brief European tour of Italy and France. While there I noted certain interesting and universal racial dynamics.

In the former locale, blacks are blissfully sparse. I note that in situations where their numbers are thin (lacking the fabled "critical mass") they behave much as civilized human beings do. Even without engaging them in conversation, as I am forthrightly loathe to do, one immediately notices a difference: the characteristic sneer, leer, arrogance, and animosity that all whites recognize instinctively is gone--or rather held firmly beneath the surface. It seems that if their savagery has no protective cover, then they (publicly) do not behave as savages.

In France the story was far different. And far more familiar to Americans, with one exception. There are many blacks in Paris--enough to make one weep for the country's indigenous population. Though they are not entirely similar to the ones we know and love in America. While we enjoy the somewhat diluted milk-chocolate variety, Paris is teeming with the hard-stuff, uncut by any white grandpappy or slatternly white female. In fact, the Africans there are so black they're blue.

One thing that kept my homesickness at bay was watching the black frogs behave as I have spent a lifetime growing accustomed to. For instance, they routinely jumped the subway turnstiles to avoid paying--all in plain view of hundreds of white Parisians standing patiently in line to feed through their paid tickets. Though to be fair, I did see one single white man do the same. This fact should provide ample sustenance for the "Whitey does it too" choir.

I also was serenaded one day by a throng of protesting Africans banging cans and bellowing into bullhorns. They were, of course, demanding more. More of what is not the question. It is enough simply to know that the tick always, eternally demands more from the white dog. While this caterwauling was in full throat I noticed a small platoon of white Gendarmerie watching the spectacle with some interest. As they were fully geared out I considered asking to be temporarily deputized so as to assist with any necessary baton-swinging, though my French was too weak to properly articulate the notion.

In any event, I am safely home in the land of the ubiquitous negro heffalump. Speaking of Desiree, I see that she has returned from her too brief and much unlamented absence. Some things never change.