Monday, August 31, 2009

#75. Lack of Black Head Coaches in College Football

Bear Bryant, whom many consider to be the finest football coach in history, will also be the man that Black people in the future "Black World" canonize as being the patron saint of making Southern football accommodating to Black people, and in large part, the nation.

It was 1972, and the University of Alabama's vaunted football program was struggling to win games with its all-white team, as other university's were employing Black people in great numbers on both sides of the ball. Having gone 12-11 in 1969 and 1970, Bryant decided what Alabama needed to lift themselves from barely above .500 was Black people:
"Before the start of the 1970 season, Bryant decided to take the initiative. At a January coaches meeting, he ran into his friend John McKay, the head coach of the University of Southern California Trojans, one of college football's most celebrated integrated teams. ... The Trojans would play in Birmingham to open the 1970 season, and Alabama would return the favor in Los Angeles the following autumn. Bryant must have known that his talent-deficient Tide team was no match for Southern Cal, and that proved to be the case. USC's two great black running backs, Sam "the Bam" Cunningham, who scored three touchdowns that afternoon, and Clarence Davis, who had been born in Birmingham, ran all over Alabama for a crushing 42-21 victory.

The one-sidedness of the defeat shocked many Alabamians... Cunningham, and proceeded to take him into the Alabama locker room, where he announced, "Gentlemen, this is what a football player looks like."

Bryant did go to the USC locker room to congratulate Cunningham, but the rest is fiction: The Alabama players didn't need to be told that the Tide had to integrate. Sam Cunningham, in Bear Bryant's words, "did more to integrate Alabama in one afternoon than Martin Luther King had in years."

Black people now comprise the majority of every Southeastern Conference (SEC) football team a mere 40 years later. Only lowly Vanderbilt dares trot out a majority white team, as the academic standards of the school leave Black people out of the admissions running in most cases, except for those who might be able to score a 22 on the Wonderlic Test.

Almost all of the FBS schools that field majority Black football teams are comprised of nearly all-white student bodies. Black people don't mind this though, as the adulation of white people is one of their favorite things in life and with many future disingenuous white liberals being the bulk of those students bodies, its good practice for the future.

And yet, despite the multi-billion dollars that these athletes - many of them Black people - bring to their university's, there is a paucity of Black head coaches attempting to maintain order on campuses nationwide.

DeWayne Walker, Ron English, Mike Locksley (New Mexico State, Eastern Michigan and New Mexico) join Turner Gill, Randy Shannon, Mike Haywood (Buffalo, Miami, Fl., Miami, Ohio) and Kevin Sumlin of Houston are the only Black head coaches in college football:

"In major-college football history, exactly two marquee jobs have gone to black coaches: Oklahoma hired John Blake in 1996, and Notre Dame hired Tyrone Willingham in 2002. Each was given three seasons before being booted."
Willingham, once the Token Black of head coaches, didn't fare well at Notre Dame and did even worse at Washington, taking that once powerful program into the lands only diversity could lead them, 0-12 in 2008 and a pathetic 11-37 in four seasons.

Mississippi State was the first SEC school to hire a Black head coach in Sylvester Croom, who was described as the Jackie Robinson of head coaching for breaking the color barrier in the deep south. His first season in 2004 saw him go 3-8 and he finished his career at MSU with a record of 21-38.

Why do we lump these men as failures together, when white coaches aren't held to the same monolithic standard? Because Black people that are coaches have the Black Coaches Association (renamed Black Coaches and Administrators), a place where Black people can lobby for more losing coaches to saddle the ranks of major college football with attempts at creating a racial balance quickly, as their mission is to:

  • To address significant issues pertaining to the participation and employment of ethnic minorities in sport in general and intercollegiate athletics in particular.
  • To assist ethnic minorities aspiring to have a career in athletics through educational and professional development programming and scholarships.
  • To provide youth and diverse communities the opportunity to interact positively with the BCA as a corporate citizen and community builder through a variety of alliances
As SBPDL has shown, sports is only field where Black people surpass all other races - except incarceration rates - and show Black people in a positive light, given them access to complete entertainment domination and the adulation of white people everywhere.

Stuff Black People Don't Like will show in the coming week, as we prepare for the 2009 season, that Black people do not like their college athletes to graduate from college; they hate it when the lights to out on their careers; lack of Black mascots; Tim Tebow; White Running Backs; following team rules; and the media over-hyping Myron Rolle (because all Black people are capable of his intellectual acumen!).

However, for now Stuff Black People Don't Like includes the lack of Black Head Coaches in College Football's FBS division, for in the age of Mein Obama, only when a Black person is in control of all 120 FBS teams will the Black Coaches and Administrators organization be happy.

Black head coaches have failed at schools from Michigan State, Notre Dame, Oklahoma, Washington, Mississippi State, UCLA, to Kansas State and a few others. White head coaches have failed at these schools as well, but they don't form groups to protect their interests. Perhaps that is why in the end, they will fail. To Black people, everything is about race. To white people, everything is about winning, regardless if white people lose in the end.

All Quiet Before the Storm

Friends of SBPDL. Your patience in waiting for new posts will be rewarded with a flurry of posts today and the rest of the week.

As stated, changes are coming to the blog with the introduction of a true website shortly, followed by the first podcast - which is complete and ready to upload.

Again, the goal is to get a new post everyday, but a hectic travel schedule throughout the entire western portion of the United States derailed those efforts this week.

Our apologies.

Prepare though, for two posts today, including the first post regarding College Football and SBPDL.

There will be a torrential downpour of new SBPDL's starting with THE REALITY OF FULTON COUNTY - home to Atlanta, Georgia and some of the most entertaining Stuff Black People Don't Like subjects on earth.

We will be back with two new posts today. Be ready.

Thursday, August 27, 2009

#29. The Great Outdoors

Black people are the most interesting subject matter, not just in the United State, but on earth. Today's posting will justify that claim.

It has been hypothesized that all human life evolved out of Africa, but the lack of development in that continent throughout human history and Black people living there - until the age of European colonization - would seem to be enough proof in itself that the "Out of Africa" is a farce.

More so, Black people were for most of their existence in Africa, living as one with the wilderness on the Dark Continent. The Great Outdoors of Africa was where Black people found communion and harmony, never reaching past the incredible technological advances of the mud-hut for a home (Black people also found fermenting alcohol quite difficult).

Living for centuries in The Great Outdoors must be why Black people find them to be such a revolting vacation get-a-way in the United States.

Black people have rejected their past and the evolutionary struggle for life they endured in the wilderness and account for less than one percent of all visitors to Yosemite National Park:

"Less than 1 percent of the visitors to Yosemite are African American, a number he's eager to improve.

"It's bigger than just African Americans not visiting national parks. It's a disassociation from the natural world," said (Shelton) Johnson, who has worked in Yosemite for the past 15 of his 22 years in the Park Service. "I think it is, in part, a memory of the horrible things that were done to us in rural America."

The rejection of the natural world by the black community, he said, is a scar left over from slavery."

Wednesday, August 26, 2009

#111. Fox News Channel

Black people, as we have discussed, do not like their Local Nightly News Casts. Unlike ESPN, which highlights Black people in one of the only endeavors they excel in (sports), nightly news casts shine a dis-nevering light upon the Black community.

It little matters the city, for wherever Black people are found in copious numbers, trouble is a sturdy ally.

However, nightly news casts are of little concern to Black people when confronted with the conundrum of the Fox News Channel, which Black people erroneously believe placates the white majority (it does slightly defend Pre-Obama America, but as we will see, not white people).

Black people are incapable of watching Fox News, for the channel - to them - represents evil personified and the complete merging of Republican and white people values:

"We have watched FOX News attack President Barack Obama, first lady Michelle Obama and Black America. Bill O'Reilly called for the death of murdered abortion doctor George Tiller only months before his death. Remember, too, it was the FOX-owned New York Post who printed the monkey cartoon. It was also FOX News who lashed out against Hurricane Katrina evacuees, arguing they were to blame for an increase in homicides. Yet, the network tried to cover up the incompetence of the Bush administration that led to the deaths of many Blacks in New Orleans."

In reality, Black people will never be able to forgive Fox News for that channel acted as a voice of propaganda for George W. Bush. Hurricane Katrina was a horrible moment for Black people, for it showed the world the reality of Being Black in America (contrast Hurricane Katrina with the massive flood in Iowa three years later).

White people love Fox News, for they view Bill O'Reilly, Sean Hannity, Glen Beck and the other diverse white people who read the news as saviors of Pre-Obama America. Little do they know that the network has served as an outlet for white people's anger all these years and acts as a conduit for their energy.

In reality, Fox News does little to preserve the "old country" and "the greatest generation" (a future SBPDL), but garners massive ratings from white people who want to believe someone stands up for their interests and is actually "Fair and Balanced".

Sean Hannity, it must recalled, claimed Kim Kardashian is a moral beacon for young women in America, despite the fact that she is the same girl that Black people pass around for fun and enjoy filming her in pornographic videos that she co-stars in.

Fox News has also failed to replicate CNN's massive popular Black people-centric show, "Black in America", and instead has War Stories with Oliver North, a show that glorifies the exploits of Pre-Obama America and the sacrifices they made that have given us The Age of Obama.

Fox News Channel also fails to be in awe of Mein Obama, as other networks have graciously fallen to two knees in subservience to the president. MSNBC's Chris Matthews, besides denouncing those who disagree with Obama as racist, claimed:

CHRIS MATTHEWS: Yeah, well, you know what? I want to do everything I can to make this thing work, this new presidency work, and I think that --

JOE SCARBOROUGH: Is that your job? You just talked about being a journalist!

MATTHEWS: Yeah, it is my job. My job is to help this country.

SCARBOROUGH: Your job is the make this presidency work?

MATTHEWS: To make this work successfully. This country needs a successful presidency.

Glenn Beck, however, has begun to take that anger Fox News has been collecting and spewing forth venom that leaves Black people aghast and frightened lynch mobs might be near. Black people are even protesting his show and trying to get advertisers pulled.

Beck, of course, criticized Mein Obama, which is something that Black people don't like.

In reality though, Fox News Channel is about as favorable of Pre-Obama America as Michelle Obama was and will always be.

The flagship show, The O'Reilly Factor, recently highlighted a purported Black conservative - Harry Alford - as a wonderful man and a beacon of conservatism. Alford, head of the National Black Chamber of Commerce, is a Black radical.

Black people love him, because he fights for Black people and the creation of businesses for Black people only. White people must love, according to O'Reilly, for reasons that are difficult to ascertain.

News Corp., the company that owns Fox News Channel, agreed to create a diversity panel to ensure that evil racism is a thing of the past:

"News Corp. is forming an external diversity council in response to pressure over a New York Post cartoon that critics said compared President Barack Obama to a dead chimpanzee.

The cartoon appeared in February. News Corp. chairman Rupert Murdoch published an apology in the Post, but civil rights and community organizations demanded further action.

NAACP President and CEO Benjamin Todd Jealous said Wednesday that News Corp. had agreed to form a "diversity community council" that will meet semiannually with company executives."

In reality, Fox News Channel was created by a media mogul who saw a paucity of conservative talk in the forum of television. He saw the money that Rush Limbaugh was making over the AM/FM radio dials, and realized if white people could be lead to believe a television station was actually looking out for their interests, then the country could continue to tank as long as Fox News Channel was feeding them soma and visions of hope amid the seemingly glaring reality that America is headed for disaster.

Stuff Black People Don't Like includes the Fox News Channel, for Black people view it as the magnet of racism and a vile station that promulgates heinous invective toward Mein Obama and Black people in general.

In reality, the channel is a magnet for white people's anger and the Fox News Channel gladly rakes in the cash, for as long as people consider Sean Hannity a "great American," then The Reality of Jefferson County will be coming to a city near you soon.

Tuesday, August 25, 2009

#567. Vice President Joe Biden

Rare indeed is the victor that looks to his vanquished opponent for support or help. In the Rocky movie series, Apollo Creed - a Black person - offers his services to Rocky Balboa in the franchises third installment, in exchange for a favor at the end of Rocky III ( the favor, a non-televised sparring match between the former combatants so Apollo can try and make amends for his defeat at Rocky's hands in the prior film. The winner of this non-televised sparring session between Apollo and Rocky is still a great mystery).

Rocky accepts, as he needs to learn from his former adversary if he hopes to beat Clubber Lang (which he does, thanks to his former vanquished opponents help).

Mein Obama had an easy time in the 2008 Democratic Nomination Primaries, even when Miss Clinton tried to lower a TKO boom on BHO with the white voter card:

"Hillary Clinton said today that white voters "were supporting me," and that she was staying in the Democratic primary regardless of seemingly insurmountable odds against her winning it and growing calls to quit.

"I have a broader base to build a winning coalition on," Clinton told USA Today, citing Associated Press reports saying that Barack Obama's white support is shrinking."

However, this diatribe by Miss Clinton wasn't the biggest political gaffe of the election as that belongs to Vice President Joe Biden, who was running for the very office his current boss holds, and had this to say about Mein Obama:

"...(Biden's) remarks about Obama, the only African-American serving in the Senate, drew the most scrutiny."I mean, you got the first mainstream African-American who is articulate and bright and clean and a nice-looking guy," Biden said. "I mean, that's a storybook, man."

It is unknown who won the fight between Rocky and Apollo at the end of Rocky III, but we know who won the battle between Biden and Obama for the keys to the White House (Biden has to enter through the VP side-door). It is unknown, however, what Obama did to Biden in retaliation for his remarks that denigrated an entire race of people for failing to have the articulation powers of elocution that Mein Obama possess.

For as Biden said, he did sum up Obama correctly as he is the envy of newscasters across the country for his verbal acumen in reading speeches from a teleprompter in a articulate fashion.

Stuff Black People Don't Like includes Joe Biden, a man who is next-in-line to be President of the United States, and who had the audacity to declare what everyone who has ever listened to Black people talk, thought: That Barack Obama is maybe the first articulate Black person to run for the White House is true, and that was enough for disingenuous white liberals to support him.

Which is what Biden represents perfectly, a disingenuous white liberal, thus why he was picked to be Obama's running mate... to own the DWL vote.

The coming age of SBPDL

Stuff Black People Don't Like has taken a two-day break from posting, as the mind behind SBPDL is traveling in the western portion of the United States.

Amazingly, the web traffic for SBPDL is growing at a shocking pace, even in our absence. The planned changes to the site are in the beta stages, but will be coming soon as the first podcast for SBPDL will be arriving prior to the kickoff of the 2009 college football season (in fact, next week will be dedicated to college football and the many aspects of that great game that Black people don't like).

Two new posts will be made tonight. As this entry is published, the writer of this site is looking out at the beautiful city of Salt Lake City from an airport restaurant.

The reality of Salt Lake City is that it is maybe the most beautiful city on earth and more so, Black people don't like it, for it is devoid of their presence and is not a failing city, like Clayton County, Birmingham, Alabama or Detroit.

In fact, the Nightly News Casts here lack the horrible stories of murder and mayhem, but instead are about the glory of the residents of Salt Lake City.

SBPDL includes Salt Lake City - as an honorary entry - because the city operates perfectly without the glories of diversity, even in the Age of Obama.

Sunday, August 23, 2009

#1001. Pre-Obama America Horror Films (reader submitted entry)

(SBPDL is pleased to have a number of highly educated readers. This is the first reader submitted idea that is published under the rubric of SBPDL. If you have ideas that fit the SBPDL mold, please submit them to

As has been noted on SBPDL in earlier postings, Black people love to go to the movies. Movies provide all audiences with an opportunity to exercise various emotions vicariously via the safe medium of film. Tears, laughter, excitement, fear and every other emotion the human race universally experiences can be found on the magical screen of celluloid dreams.

One genre in particular – the horror film – allows viewers to confront the emotions of fear and horror in a safe and controlled environment, thereby allowing them to grapple with repressed impulses that need expression and finally jettisoning these impulses from their subconscious minds in a cathartic release.

The horror film, however, has traditionally given all Black people pause for consternation – at least in pre-Obama America. In a scene from Wes Craven’s Scream 3 (2000), a Black couple queued up on line to view a horror film discuss the social implications of what they are about to see. The woman chastises horror films (much less articulately) for pandering to the lowest, basest instincts of selfish white audiences, self-absorbed and privileged white people with so much time on their hands that they can afford to fret over such petty things as their bodily integrity, physical well-being, and the impenetrable safety of their homes. As Black people overwhelmingly live in ghettoes, smoke crack, beat or are beaten by their significant others and pimps, and display a general disregard for the well-being of the bodies and property of others and themselves, it is easy to understand why such concerns would stir the ire of Black folk.

Black people have had good reason to be wary of horror/thriller films, for – in pre-Obama America, at least – they have historically and accurately pinpointed white people’s fear of the Boogeyman, a childhood fear that has remained buried within the sub-conscious minds of white people. John Carpenter’s pioneering slasher film, Halloween (1978), regaled white audiences with a terrifying 90-minute odyssey in which, one fateful Halloween night, a babysitter (Jamie Lee Curtis) and her two pre-adolescent charges confront the Boogeyman in an all-white, leaf-strewn, suburban neighborhood presumably filled with soccer moms and white-collar dads.

Their previously safe, provincially sheltered suburbia has been invaded by a foreign, shadowy, malevolent force which, at film’s end, has not been eliminated. After having been jabbed with a knitting needle, stabbed with a butcher’s knife, and finally riddled with bullets, the Boogeyman falls out a second-floor window – only for the psychiatrist (Donald Pleasance in an iconic performance) to walk to the window and see an empty lawn.

“It was the Boogeyman,” sobs Jamie Lee Curtis, wracked with terror. “As a matter of fact,” replies Pleasance, “it was.” Enter John Carpenter’s chilling piano/synthesizer score, and hordes of white people shuffle from the theater, trembling with horror and grateful it was only a movie – yet acutely aware that the Boogeyman lives on, possibly to be found lurking behind the flapping sheets hanging from the clotheslines in their own suburban, back-yard paradise. If Kevin McCarthy had appeared in a tacked-on coda frantically yelling, “They’re here! You’re next!” the subtext couldn’t have been more obvious to pre-Obama Black America.

What was only hinted at in Halloween and tacitly understood by its white audience was brought out into the open in a key sequence in Brian DePalma’s 1980 exercise in Hitchcockian horror/suspense: Dressed to Kill.

The offending scene transpires in the NYC subway, and the blonde-haired, blue-eyed, would-be white victim played by Nancy Allen is menaced by a trio of Black youths. “This bitch is bothering me. I’m gonna break her fuckin’ ass!” “Why break it when we can fuck it first!” Then the chase ensues, and white audiences hold their collective breath in empathy for Nancy Allen, lest the Black youths capture her and inflict the anal rape which is so often the lot of white women who cross paths with urban Black males. Garnering the outrage of some incensed critics, this grittily honest scene nonetheless reflected the reality of urban life for white people, and explicitly designated the Boogeyman as the Black man.

In the mid-1990s, the theme of the Black Boogeyman came to an explosive head as two events came into head-on collision: the prosecution of Black Boogeyman O.J. Simpson for the murder of white, blonde-haired Nicole Brown Simpson, and an advertising billboard for Candyman 2: Farewell to the Flesh (1995), which depicted the Black Boogeyman of the first film menacing the white, blonde-haired Virginia Madsen. Needless to say, this resulted in a furor and, in the process, sparked strident claims that the advertisement deliberately exploited the racial fears encapsulated in the O.J. case.

Director Bill Condon has since repented by directing Dreamgirls (2006), in which the immense contribution of Black people to America’s rich cultural mosaic is celebrated with orgasmic fervor.

Although horror films were parodied and mocked for Black audiences with the Scary Movie franchise, a more significant development can be glimpsed on the horizon: post-Obama America is witnessing a possible rectification of white people’s justified fear of the penchant of Black people for inflicting grievous bodily injury, as well as their aptitude for turning the lives of white people inside-out with the anxiety-provoking menace that their physical proximity poses. In 2009’s risibly unrealistic Obsessed, an ambitious and successful Black man – post-Obama America’s poster boy for white-collar success – experiences a nightmare of unprecedented proportions as the equilibrium of his storybook marriage is threatened by the maniacal stalking of a sex-crazed white female co-worker,

If this is a sign of things to come, then horror-thrillers in post-Obama America will no longer tap into white America’s justified fear of the Black Boogeyman: now they will be designed to tap into Black America’s resentment of white America’s fear of the Black Boogeyman, in the process offering us a slice-of-life that not only bears no relation to reality whatsoever, but actually contradicts it.

This nascent trend, in fact, might render future horror-thrillers safe for Black audiences. Until when, and if, that happens, all Black people will continue to hate horror films, for as long as there are Black people living amongst whites, white people will fear them. As little Tommy said in Halloween, “You can’t kill the Boogeyman.” And this is why pre-Obama horror films merit inclusion in Stuff Black People Don’t Like.

Saturday, August 22, 2009

#297. Toto's "Africa"

The sudden and tragic of passing of John Hughes has sparked a renewed interest in his films and the decade that he immortalized - the 1980s.

Black people came into their own in the 1980s, thanks to MTV, The Cosby Show and most importantly Michael Jackson.

Although they were completely absolved from the casting decisions of Hughes' films, the 1980s were the foundation for the coming Black dominance of popular culture in the 1990s and 2000s. Eddie Murphy and the films he starred in opened up a new era for Black comedians and Black athletes were worshipped as never before, with his Airness, Michael Jordan, assuming the throne of white adulation.

However, the 1980s gave birth to a befuddling song - a Number One Billboard hit - that still garners airplay today and continues to gain in popularity: Toto's Africa.

It is hard to imagine what was going through the bands collective minds when they sat down to pen Africa, as the band Toto is comprised of a bunch of white people. What gives white people the right to sing about Africa, as Black people have been trying to force white people from their ancestral homeland for decades? More importantly, what in the world is the song about?:
"The initial idea for the song came from David Paich, playing on his piano. Jeff explains the idea behind the song: "... a white boy is trying to write a song on Africa, but since he's never been there, he can only tell what he's seen on TV or remembers in the past."
Hmm, if what a white boy sees on TV was the basis for the song Africa, then the lyrics to that song would be entirely different. Black people have done everything in their power to consolidate power into their hands, at the expense of the white people who created the nations they graciously allowed to live in.

Rhodesia? What was once the breadbasket of Africa is gone, replaced with Zimbabwe and widespread corruption. South Africa? No more, the subject of fascinating new movie called District 9. Before white people arrived in Africa, what is now South Africa was just land. After whites cultivated the land, they built a thriving First-World nation - the envy of the world - that Black people could only dream of replicating.

Now under Black rule since 1994, South Africa is like Detroit, Jefferson County or Clayton County, a nation crumbling and nearing dystopian levels of degradation and violence that even the most macabre mind couldn't imagine.

Is this what Toto was singing about?

Toto wrote a song that is ostensibly about the love of a woman and "blessed the rain down in Africa"(lyrics to song):
"Its gonna take a lot to drag me away from you
Theres nothing that a hundred men or more could ever do
I bless the rains down in africa
Gonna take some time to do the things we never had"

The lyrics to this classic song discuss Africa, but not in the disingenuous white liberal manner in which Black people would like to have a song named after their home continent should. Take "We are the World", another 1980s song that discusses Africa in the only way Black people want the continent discussed: with pity and white paternalistic hope of saving everyone:

"We Are the World" is a song and charity single recorded by the supergroup USA for Africa. It was written by Michael Jackson and Lionel Richie, and co-produced by Quincy Jones and Michael Omartian for the 1985 album of the same name. The idea for the creation of a benefit single for African famine relief had initially come from activist Harry Belafonte, who, along with fundraiser Ken Kragen, was instrumental in bringing the vision to reality.
"Several musicians were contacted by the pair, before Jackson and Richie were assigned the task of writing the song. Following several months of working together, the duo completed the writing of "We Are the World" one night before the anthem's first recording session, in early 1985. The last recording session for the song was held on January 28, 1985. The historic event brought together some of the biggest artists in the music industry at the time."
"We are the World" deals with Black suffering, poverty, starvation and famine in Africa, all byproducts of Black people and peculiar characteristics that follow Black people to wherever they migrate or are found around the world, whether it be in Europe, the United States or in South America. Crusading white pedagogues use this song as their anthem when trying to show how much they care about Black people.

Toto's Africa is a song that brings a smile to the face of anyone who hears it, whereas "We are the World" brings about a look of a disgust of one the persons face who hears it embodies the ultimate disingenuous white liberal fantasy: creating a vast one-world that resembles Africa as it currently is, in all its glory!

Stuff Black People Don't Like includes Toto's Africa, a song sung by white people that has nothing to do with famine, colonialism or white racism toward the indigenous people in Africa or the evils of Apartheid - or for that matter Black people.

It's a happy song about Africa and in Africa, only misery can be glamorized.

Thursday, August 20, 2009

#222. Silenced Whistle Tips

Black people love to make noise. As we have seen with rappers and sports stars, Black people have a constant need of attention that rivals a two-year-old.

Nowhere are Black people more notorious for trying to attract attention then by their vehicles. It is said that a car defines a man, and if this is so, Black people must be defined as perpetually stuck in the infamous The Simpson's episode where Homer meets his brother, a president of a prominent car manufacture (The episode is Oh Brother, Where Art Thou?). Homer designs a vehicle so ridiculous and tricked out that it bankrupts his brothers firm. Dubbed "The Homer," Black people found the car amazing and decided to incorporate into their imaginative designs.

Black people have taken a nod from this episode and attempted to out Homer, Homer Simpson in designing the most unimaginably horrifying vehicles that patrol motorways across the nation.

One of the main accessories Black people enjoy putting on their cars - besides rims - is the whistle tip, an item that:
"Whistle tips, also referred to as whistler tips, or whistlers, are modified vehicle exhaust pipes that generate a deafening whistling sound during the operation of a motor vehicle, and they can often be heard up to even a mile away.

The whistle tip is a small metal plate with a central hole that is welded into the inner tip of the exhaust pipe. As exhaust gasses are forced through the exhaust system under pressure, they pass through the hole, generating a whistling sound. This fad began within the Oakland Afro-American community..."
Black people, as we know, love attention. Nothing says attention like a whistle tip creating a deafening noise that would give the alien ships from War of the Worlds a run for the their money.

The noise so infuriated people that the decision was made to silence Black people's imaginative invention once and for all:

"As their sole purpose is to create very loud noises that often disturb the peace, whistle tips have received negative publicity, especially among the residents of certain locations where they are prevalent. In 2002, San Leandro, California redrafted its noise ordinance to ban the devices and the Oakland Police Department began cracking down on them by interpreting state laws as including tinkering with mufflers.

"The Berkeley City Council supported a measure by Assemblywoman Wilma Chan (D-Alameda) introduced a bill into the California State Assembly in 2003 which would effectively ban whistle tips in California. The bill was passed 22-15 by the state senate and then signed into law by Governor Gray Davis, going into effect on January 1, 2004. While violators will be subject to fines of $250 and businesses that install them can be fined up to $1,000, surcharges and enforcement fees will bring it up to $850 and $3,400."
Stuff Black People Don't Like includes silenced whistle tips, one of the most powerful inventions in Black people's canon of inventions, that has now been silenced by the envious white power structure.

Thankfully, Black people still have out-Homered Homer Simpson in hideous cars, but they have lost whistle tips and will be forced to invent another noise maker to make up for this inexcusable loss.

Show all

Wednesday, August 19, 2009

#82. Naval Academy Academic Standards

Previously, on SBPDL, we learned that Black people do not like Real American Heroes. The real United States military and the elite soldiers that comprise the Navy Seals, Air Force Special Forces, Rangers and Delta Force are overwhelmingly white, as are 97 percent of the pilots who fly for our armed forces.

Unlike the G.I. Joe: Rise of Cobra movie, which tried to show a majority of the elite fighters as Black people, reality is stunningly and convincingly white. Black people don't like this, and in the age of Mein Obama needed a fictitious film like G.I. Joe to bolster their fragile egos.

Black people also don't like Pre-Obama America at all, for it is an era (1776 - 2009) that is dead and represented evil white supremacy and Black subjection. White people may have created and sustained a civilization that ultimately sent a man to the moon, but Black people will gladly take the reigns of that society now and will attempt to pull a Zimbabwe in America (or Clayton or Jefferson County).

Now, Black people are attempting to become Real American Heroes, albeit in a new light. Standards will have to be lowered dramatically to make it happen, but Black people are coming to the Naval Academy in droves this upcoming semester, because diversity is the fundamental goal of the Post-Obama America and the lowering of Pre-Obama America standards is the only way to ensure it becomes a reality:
"The Chief of Naval Operations Adm. Gary Roughead announced in Annapolis recently that "diversity is the number one priority" at the Naval Academy.
The Naval Academy superintendent, Vice Adm. Jeffrey Fowler, echoed him. Everyone understands that "diversity" here means nonwhite skins.

Fowler insisted recently that we needed to have Annapolis graduates who "looked like" the Fleet, where enlisted people are about 42 percent nonwhite, largely African American and Hispanic."

In an article in the Washington Post, a member of the admissions board stated that the only way to increase Black people presence at the school was to drastically lower standards for admittance:
"Fleming says the increase in minority enrollment at the academy has brought in students with lower grades and SAT scores who need more remedial classes and are less capable of the scholarship for which the academy is known.

"First of all, we're dumbing down the Naval Academy," Fleming said in an interview. "Second of all, we're dumbing down the officer corps."

Fleming asserts, correctly, that Black people are treated differently in their application process and get in with lower scores and:
"Once at Annapolis, “diverse” midshipmen are over-represented in our pre-college classes, in lower-track courses, in mandatory tutoring programs and less challenging majors. Many struggle to master basic concepts. (I teach some of these courses.)"

Much like the Wonderlic Test, Black people find the Naval Academy Standards as applied to white people to difficult to master and thus, must resort to fuzzy math to ensure greater representation of their people at a formerly important institution of higher learning.

Now, the notion of creating fictitious Real American Heroes in film has seeped into the Naval Academies admissions, as the school has lowered the flag of quality applicants and rigorous, difficult scholastics to introduce diversity and Post-Obama America to our nations future Navy officer classes.

The only way Pre-Obama America could be destroyed is to lower standards to include the people who support Mein Obama with 97 percent approval and who voted him by a margin of 96 percent-to-One percent in the 2008 Presidential Election.

The words of one of the highest ranking officers in the Navy need to remembered forever, as we enter Post-Obama America, for the standards of Real American Heroes no longer matter, and to ensure diversity and Black people's rightful place in the new Black world, we must lower standards completely:
"The Chief of Naval Operations (CNO) Adm. Gary Roughead released a podcast on the importance of diversity and the Navy's diversity initiatives Feb. 27.

"In the military and in the Navy, it's important that we are a diverse organization because we have to represent what I call the face of America," said Roughead. "As our population changes and the percentages of majority-minority changes and that's always taking place we have to reflect that same demographic in our Navy and that's why it's important, but at the end of the day, it really makes a huge difference because we're stronger because of the different perspectives and ideas that people bring to bear."
Stuff Black People Don't Like includes Naval Academy Academic Standards, for the only way to include a high percentage of Black people in one of Post-Obama America's greatest academic institutions, Pre-Obama America Academic standards had to be tossed out.

The Chinese, Russian, British and other nations only allow the smartest and most intelligent people in their nations to be officers and defend their nation. In Post-Obama America, Real American Heroes have to be made up... in movies and through lowering of the standards at our elite military schools.

Tuesday, August 18, 2009

#163. The Wonderlic Test

Grown men and the young alike of all races spend untold hours of their day unproductively researching inane statistics of their favorite athletes and football teams; spending time carousing message boards such as and to learn about the latest Black high school recruit that will sign with their alma mater; and waste months of their lives digesting every nugget of information regarding the National Football League (NFL) draft, an event that is now more celebrated than most men's wedding anniversary.

After the Super Bowl, men fret about the lack of sports to follow, but the creation of 21st centuries version of the Slave Meat Market has enabled white sports fans a continuance of football as they get the chance to salivate over future NFL players prior to their being drafted.

The NFL Draft is now a holy day that is beloved by white sports fans everywhere, for they get the opportunity to relive the days of their ancestors whom once partook in the buying and selling of Black people for their betterment. Then, it was slavery, now, it is for strictly entertainment purposes and the NFL offers wonderful jubilation.

Warren Sapp, a once talented defensive lineman in the NFL, confirmed this notion of a modern-day plantation, as he famously said:
"If you're a black man in America who makes money, you're supposed to just shut up."

Never one to shy away from a supportive analogy, Sapp added that NFL players are like "slaves," and the commissioner and league owners are like "slave masters."

The NFL Draft and the combines that lead up to it offer white people the chance to see a modern-day slave market in action, as Black people and the occasional white player (whites make up roughly 39 percent of the NFL rosters) are forced to run the 40-yard dash, perform the shuttle run, do as many reps of 225 on the bench press as they can, and, most importantly, take a Wonderlic Test.

What is the Wonderlic Test, you may ask? It is simply a test that measures an individual's IQ, and gives the potential employer of the Black athlete an opportunity to measure their intelligence:
"Wonderlic Personnel Test is a twelve-minute, fifty-question test used to assess the aptitude of prospective employees for learning and problem-solving in a wide range of occupations. The score is calculated as the number of correct answers given in the allotted time. A score of 20 is intended to indicate average intelligence ... corresponding to an intelligence quotient of 100."
Black people excel at the tests of physical endurance (as do many white players who post numbers equal or greater to the Black players), but have infamously been lousy at taking the Wonderlic. Vince Young famously scored a 6 out of 50 on his Wonderlic, and he has since demonstrated amazing intellect in the NFL, being benched and partaking in "Making it Rain" like his former teammate Pacman Jones.

As the story linked to above from USA Today tells us:
"A score of 20 indicates average intelligence. A 50 is a perfect score, which has rarely been achieved; former Bengals punter Pat McInally is believed to be the only player to ever get a 50. For the record, McInally attended Harvard."
McInally, besides being a lowly punter, is also white. So his score doesn't count, but Kevin Curtis - a white wide receiver who plays for the Philadelphia Eagles - scored a 48.

A sample question from the test that so perplexed Vince Young - and most other Black players - at the NFL's modern-day slave market:

"The first questions on the test are easy, but they get harder and harder.

An easy question: In the following set of words, which word is different from the others? 1) copper, 2) nickel, 3) aluminum, 4) wood, 5) bronze.

A tougher one: A rectangular bin, completely filled, holds 640 cubic feet of grain. If the bin is 8 feet wide and 10 feet long, how deep is it"

Black people find these questions very difficult and routinely score poorly on the Wonderlic, leaving the test feeling bemused and highly desirous of performing the 40-yard dash again to bolster their ego.

Some scores of Black athletes that white people pay money to worship for their entertainment value, that were drafted in the 2009 draft:

" Matt Stafford (white) proved that he's definitely pretty smart. Stafford scored a 38 on the Wonderlic which obviously boosts his stock. USC's Mark Sanchez (Hispanic) scored a 28 and Kansas State's Josh Freeman (Black) a 27, which is about average for QBs.

Seems the wide receiving corps is especially stupid this year. Michael Crabtree of Texas Tech scored a 15, Darrius Heyward-Bey of Maryland scored a 14, and Percy Harvin of Florida scored a 12. Not real good. But don't worry, there was someone who was worse. Hakeem Nicks of UNC wowed everyone with an 11. A score of 10 suggests a person is literate, so at least all of the receivers can read this, I hope."
All of the above receivers are Black people. It has been reported that receivers, a position dominated by Black people in the NFL - save for Wes Welker and the Colt's receiving core - have an average Wonderlic score of 17:

Offensive tackles: 26
Centers: 25
Quarterbacks: 24
Guards: 23
Tight Ends: 22
Safeties: 19
Middle linebackers: 19
Cornerbacks: 18
Wide receivers: 17
Fullbacks: 17
Halfbacks: 16
Regardless of the incredible poor performance of Black people on the Wonderlic, they continue to be drafted in numbers that consistently make them 69 percent of the NFL's entertainers and also the fodder of Jeff Benedict and his book exposing the criminal nature of 21 percent of NFL players (as of 1998) who had committed a serious crime.

The Wonderlic Test is a conundrum to Black people and a paradox to owners of NFL teams who will soon employ these 21st century indentured servants.

For, Stuff Black People Don't Like includes the Wonderlic Test, a bastion of whiteness in a sea of imminent Blackness. Black people wish this draconian IQ Test would go away or they could be absolved from taking it, as the low scores they consistently get cause their gushing white supporters to snicker at their intellectual inabilities.

Monday, August 17, 2009

#5. Republicans

Black people are hard to please. They will never forgive white people for Pre-Obama America, an era that they deem dead and gone.

Regardless of obsequious actions performed by white people to placate Black people, resentment and bitterness will always exist.

Reparations? Not enough. Free college education for all Black people? Nope. Affirmative Action? Hasn’t gone far enough in Black people’s eyes. Making a Black person head of the Republican National Committee? Say what?

Michael Steele, a Black person, is head of the RNC, a political organization that receives nearly 90 percent of its support from the most hated political voting bloc in Post-Obama America – white people. John McCain received exactly three percent of the Black vote in the 2008 election so in a bid to cause Black people to flock to the Republican Party, Mr. Steele was given the nod to lead the de-facto white party.

The grand idea as to attracting Black people – who still support Barack Obama with a full 97 percent approval rating – is to make the GOP a “hip hop” party:

“We need messengers to really capture that region - young, Hispanic, black, a cross section ... We want to convey that the modern-day GOP looks like the conservative party that stands on principles. But we want to apply them to urban-surburban hip-hop settings.”

Another idea he had to get Black people to vote for the GOP was more interesting:

“The shoot from the lip Steele with a wry smile and a chuckle told a questioner that he'll get more black folk into the GOP by ladling out scoops of potato salad and every black's favorite, fried chicken to them.”

You would think that, based upon the voting habits of white people, the Republican Party would reflect the desires of the majority of its supporters. Wrong. The GOP goes out of its way to demonize, use and abuse its overwhelmingly white base, as it tries to attract Black voters into its lily-white ranks.

Black conservatives, that rare breed of renegade Black person that wishes to be both the Token Black and charged as Acting White, are looked upon by white people as the Holy Grail of Reflecting Racism charges.

Laughably, they are thrust to the forefront of any party, television show or convention as a reminder that Black people are welcomed in the GOP and promoted to the top right away.

Exit polls for the 2008 election showed:

“And minorities went heavily into the Obama camp. Blacks, 96 percent Obama to 3 percent McCain; Latinos, 67 percent Obama to 30 percent McCain; and Asians, 63 percent Obama to 34 percent McCain.”

With those numbers in mind, consider that both McCain and Obama each spent $1 billion in their quest for the White House. Collecting a measly three percent of the Black vote and spending $1 billion in the process is a poor return-on-investment for the senator from Arizona.

However, in 2000, George W. Bush was also attempting to get a large portion of the Black vote and yet he failed in that early bid to bring “hip hop” to the GOP dance:

George W. Bush's strenuous efforts at "minority outreach" were rewarded by the lowest fraction of the black vote since Barry Goldwater. Depending on which exit poll you consult, Dubya carried between 8% and 10% of African-American voters.

Why do Black people not vote for Republicans? One Black writer for CNN, wrote:

“Ever since Richard Nixon ran for the White House, the GOP has run on a "Southern Strategy," meant to alienate blacks in an effort to garner white voters. They've worked the strategy to perfection. When he was head of the Republican National Committee, Ken Mehlman apologized for that strategy as he sought to make inroads among black voters.”

In 2006, Mehlman tried to bring about a Black Republican revolution, which failed, although he had this to say:

"We've gone from a model of outreach to a model of inclusion," Mehlman said. "Outreach is a top-down approach. Inclusion says, 'Let's find some really good people and encourage them to run for office.' "

Bruce Bartlett wrote a book trying to demonize the racist past of the Democratic Party, but he fails in this analysis to remember the crucial part of why Black people vote for the Democratic Party: Black people think everything in Pre-Obama America was and is inherently racist, regardless of what it was or is. The Democrats might have been racist, but they are the party of Obama now.

The Republicans are seen as defending Pre-Obama America and thus, will always be seen as nefarious in Black people’s eyes.

Even staunch Black Republicans voted for Obama, because race will always triumph politics. And these Black Republicans were getting tired of being the Token Black:

“…well-known black Republicans have also said they are at least considering Obama, including conservative talk show host Armstrong Williams and former Secretary of State Collin Powell Former Republican Rep. J. C. Watts received attention when he told reporters he was contemplating an Obama vote. "I'm a free agent," says Watts, who is one of the only two black Republicans to serve in the House of Representatives since the 1930s.

"I wouldn't just vote for a Republican candidate just because they are Republican, no more than I would vote for a black candidate just because they're black." For Watts it's not the historical nature of the race that leaves him undecided, it's frustration toward his own party. "African-American Republicans in the faith community are the most forgotten demographic in the Republican Party," Watts says. And he hopes the GOP will allot more resources toward attracting black voters. “

Stuff Black People Don’t Like includes Republicans, regardless of how many outreach programs, initiatives and money is thrown their way by whitey. Black people don’t like Acting White or being the Token Black, and they especially hate Pre-Obama America. The Black vote is lost to Republicans, because SBPDL includes Republicans, the most evil entity left in America that stands in the way of the coming “this is a Black world,” that Black people have been waiting for, for so long.

Podcast and new site

SBPDL was quiet over the weekend and for good reason. A new website will soon be unveiled that will contain the first Stuff Black People Don't Like podcast.

What started as an idea to educate the world on Stuff Black People Don't Like has become the leading site on the internet to understand the many nuisances of Black people.

We appreciate everyone who comments - please keep them constructive - emails and publicity the site has received. We have been up for less than 90 days and have been overwhelmed with the growth of the site and the dedication of many of our readers.

Thanks to everyone who has visited and we hope you continue to enjoy the website. SBPDL is about to see major changes, and they are all due to the response we have received from you, the reader.

Thanks again (we will be posting everyday this week, and will have two posts to make up for Saturday and Sunday).

Friday, August 14, 2009

#345. Gay Marriage

Tolerance. Acceptance. Not judging others by the content of their character nor the color of the skin. Sadly, St. Martin Luther King Jr. - who, with Mein Obama and Jackie Robinson will one day adorn the Black Mount Rushmore - never said anything in his Sermon on the Mount about Gay people and, more specifically, Gay Marriage.

The virtues of tolerance and inclusion are bedrocks of white people's upbringing and how they are expected to live, as they are constantly told not be judgmental, intolerant, prejudicial nor racist toward any race, homophobic to different sexual orientations or intolerant to disabled people

Racism and homophobia are twin diseases in Post-Obama America and will be deemed psychological disorders that require heavy medication in the near future. Of course, only white people can be homophobic or racist and they will be heavily sedated so as to eradicate the only source of evil left on the planet that could disrupt THE AGE OF OBAMA.

Black people however, can do no wrong when it comes to racism nor homophobia. So 96 percent of Black people voted for Obama in the 2008 election? So what? Black people just wanted to feel proud and ensure that they could see the day they never thought they would in their lifetime!

That's not racist! It's racist to even point out that 96 percent of Black people voted for Mein Obama! Black people are immune from being called as a racist, for only white people can be racist.

And, only white people can be homophobic, even though 70 percent of Black people voted to defeat Gay Marriage in California:

" of an overwhelming number – 70 percent – of black voters in California who voted for Proposition 8 and helped secure its passage, according to exit polling conducted by Edison Media Research and Mitofsky International.

African Americans, energized by Barack Obama's presidential bid, boosted their numbers at the polls this year to 10 percent of the state's electorate, up from 6 percent in 2004.

"The Obama people were thrilled to turn out high percentages of African Americans, but (Proposition 8) literally wouldn't have passed without those voters," said Gary Dietrich, president of Citizen Voice, a nonpartisan voter awareness organization."

But that's not homophobic! Black people were just excited about Mein Obama and his imminent coronation and in their jubilation, accidentally voted 70 percent of the time for keeping homosexuals from getting married.

It's obvious that Black people believe that "queering doesn't make the world work," and are shocked that such a proposition could be put forth at a time when the Black family is making a triumphant return from its recent nosedive into the 70 percent of Black babies born out of wedlock.

Family values, after all, are the bedrock of the Black community.

Why Black people against Gay Marriage, when the rest of the enlightened United States is for it?:

"The NBJC report ... cites surveys showing that "65% of African-Americans are opposed to marriage equality compared to 53% of Whites" and that blacks are "less than half as likely to support marriage equality and legal recognition of same-sex civil unions as Whites." It concludes: "African-Americans are virtually the only constituency in the country that has not become more supportive over the last dozen years, falling from a high of 65% support for gay rights in 1996 to only 40% in 2004." Nor is the problem dying out: "Among African-American youth, 55% believed that homosexuality is always wrong, compared to 36% of Latino youth and 35% of White youth."

Why the gap?

The answer is: They think sexual orientation is different from race. Martin Luther King Jr. spoke of a nation in which individuals would be judged not "by the color of their skin but by the content of their character." Whites, on balance, have come to believe that sexual orientation, like color, is immutable. Blacks, on balance, haven't. They see homosexuality as a matter of character."

Black people can't be homophobic. The intolerant and racist coat can only be worn by white people. It doesn't fit Black people well and they can easily shed its uncomfortable fabric.

However, Stuff Black People Don't Like includes Gay Marriage and yet, their disapproval of homosexuals exchanging wedding vows isn't based on hate, intolerance, bigotry or homophobia, but merely family values.

Only white people can be hateful. Black people, especially in the AGE OF OBAMA are immune from any negativity.