Wednesday, February 17, 2010

Errant Snowballs Lead to Mass Arrests in Philadelphia

In the history of snowball fights, few have attained the notoriety of the infamous December 2009 snow war that ended with the enraged Washington DC police officer, Detective Mike Baylor, arresting many combatants after brandishing a firearm. No snowball – despite the engineering and precision used in its creation – can compete with a gun.

However, the snow that pelted the eastern portion of the United States had a maddening affect on Black people in Philadelphia, as 100 participants in a snowball battle terrorized a Macy’s Department Store with the fury of a god slighted. According to a local nightly news reportthis time courtesy of CBS – the Macy’s was overrun with unruly Black people who created an impromptu Black Friday:

Investigators say a massive snowball fight outside City Hall between 100 teens spilled into a popular department store and ended with 14 arrests.

The entire ordeal began when approximately 100 teens engaged in a gigantic snowball fight outside Philadelphia's City Hall Tuesday evening.

Shortly afterwards, the unruly mob then rolled into the Macy's Department Store located in the 1300 block of Market Street.

Once inside, customers told Eyewitness News total chaos ensued.

"A couple kids were shoving and pushing and people started throwing shoes at each other. Someone threw a sign over someone's head," Eyewitness Brianne Bee said.

Customers inside the store said the incident lasted between five to 10 minutes.

A 16-year-old girl was arrested for allegedly kicking a 15-year-old boy in the face as other teens held him down outside the store. The 15-year-old is listed in stable condition at Thomas Jefferson University Hospital.

Similar to the "flash mobs" near South Street in June 2009, investigators believe Tuesday's brawl might have been organized on the internet.

According to investigators, many of the teens involved in the incident attend Simon Gratz High School.

All of the teens are facing charges of disorderly conduct, while some are facing assault charges.

No innocent bystanders were injured. The incident remains under police investigation.

Simon Gratz High School is an overwhelming Black school, and though students are required to wear uniforms the Black students discipline was lacking in the snowball fight that melted into a fury of fists quickly.

Simon Gratz is 97 percent Black and 75 percent of students are eligible for a free lunch. This school has the motto of "Educating the children of today for the opportunities of tomorrow."

The opportunities of tomorrow obviously come at the expense of the tax payer, who pony up hundreds of thousands of dollars each year so that these students can eat and then run amok throughout the streets of Philadelphia and obstructing the shopping habits of Macy’s customers.

Stuff Black People Don’t Like is saddened by the exploits of Simon Gratz finest students, for the education they are provided is preparing them for only one opportunity: jail.

Worse, it was Black people’s dislike of snow and errant snowballs that drove them into the frenzy at Macy’s to begin with. Always consult SBPDL before engaging in behavior detrimental to your health.

Watch the news story here.


Anonymous said...

"Stuff Black People Don’t Like is saddened by the exploits of Simon Gratz finest students, for the education their provided is preparing them for only one opportunity: jail."

Why be saddened? There is free lunch in jail too.


Anonymous said...

So, that house negro black cop in D.C. had the right idea. He was just in the wrong place at the wrong time.

-Black guy

Anonymous said...

what? all black people don't like snow? how about black people don't like being stereotyped.

Anonymous said...

Sure, blacks may not excel in hockey (cold), swimming (water), nor chess (strategy) but combine the three and they can have a snowball fight!